Gangsta Teeth

Ever since Ms. Frankie Jade came on the scene, I have been told of the horrors of teething. I have, at times, dealt with a little dental discomfort on the Frankie front, but I honestly didn't know what the big deal was until today. More specifically-- until 5:30 this morning and it ended...well, it hasn't yet, and I have a feeling we're in for one of those "every-2-hour" kind of nights.

When Frankie woke up wailing at 5:30 this morning, Cody and I initially attributed her discomfort and unrest to all the crap she ate last night. We had the Otis Family over for Friday night dinner and it's no secret that our luck with them hasn't been the best lately (see Oct 6 and Aug 17). Nevertheless, we love them and Frankie had a great time. She played, danced, and laughed and--not long before bedtime--she happily snuck the m&m's my girlfriend, Elise, decided she needed, and also part of a s'more that I know she didn't.

Our gut reaction to the 5:30 "wake and wail" was that Frankie had a tummy ache. Cody was the one that ran to her room and when he came back, he reported that she was a bit warm, but he found no real evidence of fever. In addition, she wasn't pulling on either of her ears, her diaper wasn't full of Friday night's remains, and there was no barfing to speak of. We concluded that we were looking at a tummy ache--completely plausible and no big deal, right? I, for one, get tummy aches all the time from being "overserved" candy, cake and cookies. Frankie's a Coden. A tummy ache on a Friday night (or any night) is nothing new in our house. In fact, it's downright normal and we assumed that when she woke for the day she'd be fine. Not so. She woke again an hour later with that same, heart wrenching wail. Since I never made it back to sleep after the first time Frankie woke, I easily jumped out of bed with quickly moving legs, but also with a slowly sinking heart.

I knew I wasn't going to enter Frankie's room to find the sunny, happy, excited kid I normally find, and I was correct. Poor Frankie was a mess. She was crying hard and big, wet tears were streaming down either side of her face as she sat on her knees and held her arms up to me. No "Hi-eee!!" this morning. No "uppahh" either. Just a lot of crying and raised arms for Mommy. It made me feel very sad to see her like that--and very powerless.

After a few bites of breakfast and a second dismissed bottle of milk, Cody managed to get Frankie down for a short nap before he left for about an hour. After a very short nap, FJ woke up crying just as I was getting out of the shower. (Of course that is when she woke up. Is there ANY OTHER time?) As I held my girl close, clad only in the towel on my head and not much else, I started to worry a bit. I HAD NO IDEA WHAT WAS WRONG WITH MY GIRL AND FRANKLY, I WAS STARTING TO GET A LITTLE SCARED.

The crying was out of control, like when she fell and hit her head a few weeks ago, but at least then I knew why she was crying. I had no idea what to attribute this to. It was a total mystery and I was (as usual) clueless. I held her and rocked her for a solid hour (still undressed and wishing I had taken a little less time in the shower) before I eventually had my stunning moment of clarity and gave Frankie some Motrin. HEL-LO?? Why did it take me so long to come up with that one? I still don't know! Am I an idiot? I guess so! The Motrin really helped. It was temporary, but it helped.

When Cody came home a short time later, I told him of my discovery and my love affair with Infant Motrin. We thought we were home free because Frankie seemed to be doing a little better, but then, with no warning at all, it wore off! What the...? ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME? This time I was the one out running errands and Cody was home. Cue the wailing and the tears--the Motrin has worn off! When I got home, we discussed all of the possible reasons for Frankie's obvious pain and abnormal behavior and Dummy Mom and Dummy Dad finally uncovered the enigma: Teething.

Who knew? Frankie has a lot of her teeth; in fact she has more than most 18-month-old kids. Who knew that some teeth hurt more than others? Who knew that some were big, bad, mean bullies? Not us, that's for sure. We didn't think teething was that big of a deal. It certainly hasn't been thus far. What do we know though? Pretty much nothing. We're the parents who actually "googled" how to piggyback motrin and tylenol. Yes, that's us.

Holding, rocking and keeping our girl close while doing the motrin and tylenol switch have, for the time being, seemed to help placate the thugs waging war in Frankie's mouth. I have no idea what tonight will bring, but we're putting on our camo and preparing for 2 hour intervals. Whatever happens in our house, at least the Otis Family can sleep well nestled in the comfort of knowing that they are in the clear. Try as we might, there is no way we can pin this one on them.

Afternote: We did consider the booze (and I don't even drink!) But we also considered it for FJ. The problem was, her gums were so irritated that she didn't want us, or anything else, near them. She found the slight Oragel rub and the Motrin/Tylenol cocktails to be so traumatizing that we didn't want to bug her more by rubbing liquor on her gums. Believe me, if I thought it would help after all the other stuff we had done, I would have given her a shot glass full of Whiskey, a straw and her own bartender.